I didn’t have to run away on a holiday (Although if my hubby surprised me with one I wouldn’t turn it down!), or even escape the home.  We just had a great day to hang out!  When I got home from the grocery run my hubby surprised me with a fresh batch of guacamole….yum!

It was nice that no one had to be anywhere.  In a family of 5 that is becoming more and more rare, especially as they grow older and are getting involved in sports.  Although it does make life busy I love that they have sports they not only enjoy, but work really hard at.  My two oldest also started doing some volunteer work for their sports facilities as well.  This past Friday they each did a 4 hour volunteer shift at a competition, they are only 11 and 9 years old, and I am proud of them.

So before I get too far off track…I just wanted you to realize what you do as a family is important.  It is good for your family to be out and involved, but don’t forget that it is also very important to take care of yourselves.

Say NO and Stay In

Sometimes taking care means you say ‘NO’ to more commitments, or to going out to visit friends and family.  Sometimes it means your are going to stay home and recharge yourself.

We had a wonderful day at home, I also noticed the children all start to relax too.  My husband started to putter, and that was fine.  The purpose of the day was not to do absolutely nothing, I just can’t do that; the purpose was that nothing had to absolutely be done.  We were not on any kind of timeline, we didn’t have to coordinate our calendars, we didn’t need to be anywhere, or pick anyone up.  We just hung out and in the process we had a wonderful family meal, the kids cleaned up their rooms and some vacuuming got done.

Give It a Try

Think of your home school now, what if you just left things…what if you set ground rules for no TV or media, but they could read whatever they wanted, they could colour, do puzzles, play games, go outside….

What do you think could come out of a “lazy homeschool day”?

Go ahead and take this idea of a lazy day to recharge yourself, but I also want you to pick a day and recharge your kids and your home school!

Some Ground Rules for Lazy Home School Day

• No TV
• No computers/video games
• No movies
• No friends
• No curriculum…none
• Free access to books
• Free access to puzzles
• Free access to board games
• Free access to art supplies
• Free access to colouring books
• Free access to the outdoors (of course thinking of safety for the little ones)

You also need to be involved, get down and play with them, look at the dinosaur book, or the book on Optics, tackle a puzzle, or even do your own craft.

Hang out together and recharge, discuss and share with each other.  You need time to just be who you are and so do your kids.

I would love to hear what new discoveries you made together!

I am really good at putting myself last and know that it can start slowly out of the simplest things like caring for a sick  child.  Of course you would cancel all of your “me time” to care for him/her, but if you are not mindful these necessary cancellations of your “me time” they can creep in and steel more and more of you away.

So what can we do about this?

If, for instance, your time for you is to craft/scrapbook/knit/workout etc.  these require a bit of time and planning.  They also require you to be very present and hands on.

What I have learned is that when things get hectic, crazy and out of sync  I still need to make my “me time” happen, even if it is simply having a quiet cup of tea or reading a great book.  

When life is chaotic,  it is okay to do your  “me time” differently!  Make a conscious effort to be mindful that this is your time to replenish a little, even if it is five minutes scattered through out your day.

Make a list of small things that recharge you, put it with your recipe box under a tab heading of your choice (Remember my post:  “Why Do You Want to Homeschool?”) and remember to reach for it when your schedule gets out of sync and you need to go into more of a survival mode.  Taking the time to think and organize these  small things to recharge you will help you be better prepared to also take care of youurself.

Now let’s move on to when things are running smoothly and fairly “normal”.  What do you like to do for you?

If you have been living in survival mode for too long, then step out and try different things.  Make a list and have some fun!  Remember to actually plan and get out to try some of those things on your list.

Taking Care of Mom

Planning for your “me time”

• Support> People around you need to know what you are doing.  Let your husband and children know there will be a change in routine so you can take up something that is of interest to you.  While you are at it let your friends and neighbours know too;  the more people you tell, the more support and reminders you will have.  They will be good reminders for you as they will most likely ask how your knitting project or your workouts are going.

• Schedule> Now that you have announced to everyone what you are going to do to take care of yourself, you need to make a schedule of when it can happen.  I started with one workout per week.

• Organize> Once you have decided on what you want to do, take a look at what time of day you will be out, is it close to supper?  Do you need to have crockpot meals ready or pre-make some meals? Line up a babysitter to have on call for those times your husband or older child may not be able to help you out.  Don’t let yourself cancel your “me time”.   You are too precious and valuable to your family to let yourself fall to the sidelines.

• Flexibility> Since so much of the home schooling and family errands fall on Mom, do allow for some flexibility.  Sometimes, even with all the support, scheduling, and organizing things just happen; allowing for flexibility will help your entire family.  Mom taking care of herself doesn’t mean you can allow the rest of the family to fall apart.  Please Note:  Being flexible does not have to mean cancelling your “me time”, it can mean you re-schedule right away and as close as possible to your regular scheduled “me time”.  It also means, that if absolutely need be, you can substitute the smaller things that recharge you which I mentioned at the beginning of this post.

Like I said before, you are a valuable asset to your family, you are the heart of the home.  Your family will feel good and happy knowing that you are feeling refreshed.

My kids get excited for me to go workout and ask me how it went.  Not to mention, I am setting a great example for them, I have worked myself back from injury to doing things that I have never done before, like running for 5 km.  I am proud of myself!  Working out also allows me to have a ‘brain break’ of sorts.  I need to concentrate on what I am doing, set goals for myself, etc. and it keeps me healthy.

Before I let you go here are some thoughts from Charlotte Mason:  Time for Mothers

“If mothers could learn to do for themselves what they do for their children when these are overdone, we should have happier households. Let the mother go out to play! If she would have the courage to let everything go when life becomes too tense, and just take a day, or half a day, out in the fields, or with a favourite book, or in a picture gallery looking long and well at just two or three pictures, or in bed, without the children, life would go on far more happily for both children and parents. The mother would then be able to hold herself in “wise passiveness’ and would not fret her children by continual interference even of hand or eye – she would let them be.”

Who was Charlotte Mason?

Charlotte Maria Shaw Mason (1 January 1842 – 16 January 1923) was a British educator who invested her life in improving the quality of children’s education. Her ideas led to a method used by some  homeschoolers.

I am getting better at finding a balance that is right for me and my family providing myself with time to take part in something which interests me.  I don’t always put myself last, and when survival mode hits I still manage to take care of me too, finding sprinkles of grace throughout my day.

What about you, what interests do you have?  What can you do to help recharge and take care of yourself?