Feeling excited and at peace with your decision, you start to gather resources, plan field trips and set up your home to be a haven where children fall in love with learning.
Even your children are excited! They start to dig into their History lessons, craft projects, and even fill their spare moments with exploring, self-directed learning, and fun, imaginative play.

Then “that day” comes!

That day where hour upon hour nothing seems to go right…nothing! Not only that, you can see it snowballing to the point where you know it is going to take you off track.
Those challenging days, whether they be a few in a row, or scattered throughout a semester, are heavy.
If we don’t have a great support system in place, that heavy feeling can open the door for doubt, fear and worry to take a firm grip of our hearts and minds.

Homeschool Fear, Worry and Doubt

The Truth You Need to Know

Truth is, you are brave and resilient enough to deal with these days!

You proved that the day you decided to go against the grain and homeschool. You also proved that during those seemingly normal and regular days of parenting! Parenting is hard work, but also abundantly rewarding!

The other truth is that if you are feeling a little short on resilience, you can decide to take the steps to find it. Homeschooling does afford you some flexibility to change things up, so take advantage of that when you are feeling weary. Dedicate some time for you to find your groove again!

“…decide…whether or not the goal is worth the risks involved. If it is, stop worrying…” ~Amelia Earhart

Prayer and Meditation

Never dismiss the power of grace!

God is so good that He gives us grace in the simplest of things if we are willing to see and accept it. We just need to be still long enough to recognize it. So, make quiet time, even if it is just a few minutes scattered through your day, a priority.

It has been proven, through MRI, that prayer and meditation actually has an affect on the grey matter of our brains. (Check out this article “Eight Weeks to a Better Brain”.)

Being still and quiet can be a challenge, and something we should work on in this age of busyness. If we tend to ‘pray on the run’, while that is fine, we also run the risk of missing all the extra little gifts of grace God is bestowing upon us and our families as we rush about the day.

We need to invest in ourselves and set aside some time everyday to meditate or pray.

When we are feeling stifled by the fear, worry and doubt it is a cue to slow down and recall why we are on this homeschool journey and to also know we are not alone. It might be time to reach out to those who can help build you back up again.  HSLDA has a link for support groups in your area, so reach out and make a connection.

No matter how brave or strong any of us are, we all have a time when we need encouragement.

Even those who lead your support group, or the ones who are your cheerleaders…we all have days where we need a boost from time to time. To know others have walked this path, to share stories of success, trials and even stories of our seemingly bland – boring days; it all goes a long way to encourage other homeschooling parents.

Especially on those days where our legs are shaky!

Be Gracious – Be Courteous – Be Genuine – Be Humble – Be Kind – Be Brave

Let’s build each other up and kick fear, worry and doubt to the curb!

I am really good at putting myself last and know that it can start slowly out of the simplest things like caring for a sick  child.  Of course you would cancel all of your “me time” to care for him/her, but if you are not mindful these necessary cancellations of your “me time” they can creep in and steel more and more of you away.

So what can we do about this?

If, for instance, your time for you is to craft/scrapbook/knit/workout etc.  these require a bit of time and planning.  They also require you to be very present and hands on.

What I have learned is that when things get hectic, crazy and out of sync  I still need to make my “me time” happen, even if it is simply having a quiet cup of tea or reading a great book.  

When life is chaotic,  it is okay to do your  “me time” differently!  Make a conscious effort to be mindful that this is your time to replenish a little, even if it is five minutes scattered through out your day.

Make a list of small things that recharge you, put it with your recipe box under a tab heading of your choice (Remember my post:  “Why Do You Want to Homeschool?”) and remember to reach for it when your schedule gets out of sync and you need to go into more of a survival mode.  Taking the time to think and organize these  small things to recharge you will help you be better prepared to also take care of youurself.

Now let’s move on to when things are running smoothly and fairly “normal”.  What do you like to do for you?

If you have been living in survival mode for too long, then step out and try different things.  Make a list and have some fun!  Remember to actually plan and get out to try some of those things on your list.

Taking Care of Mom

Planning for your “me time”

• Support> People around you need to know what you are doing.  Let your husband and children know there will be a change in routine so you can take up something that is of interest to you.  While you are at it let your friends and neighbours know too;  the more people you tell, the more support and reminders you will have.  They will be good reminders for you as they will most likely ask how your knitting project or your workouts are going.

• Schedule> Now that you have announced to everyone what you are going to do to take care of yourself, you need to make a schedule of when it can happen.  I started with one workout per week.

• Organize> Once you have decided on what you want to do, take a look at what time of day you will be out, is it close to supper?  Do you need to have crockpot meals ready or pre-make some meals? Line up a babysitter to have on call for those times your husband or older child may not be able to help you out.  Don’t let yourself cancel your “me time”.   You are too precious and valuable to your family to let yourself fall to the sidelines.

• Flexibility> Since so much of the home schooling and family errands fall on Mom, do allow for some flexibility.  Sometimes, even with all the support, scheduling, and organizing things just happen; allowing for flexibility will help your entire family.  Mom taking care of herself doesn’t mean you can allow the rest of the family to fall apart.  Please Note:  Being flexible does not have to mean cancelling your “me time”, it can mean you re-schedule right away and as close as possible to your regular scheduled “me time”.  It also means, that if absolutely need be, you can substitute the smaller things that recharge you which I mentioned at the beginning of this post.

Like I said before, you are a valuable asset to your family, you are the heart of the home.  Your family will feel good and happy knowing that you are feeling refreshed.

My kids get excited for me to go workout and ask me how it went.  Not to mention, I am setting a great example for them, I have worked myself back from injury to doing things that I have never done before, like running for 5 km.  I am proud of myself!  Working out also allows me to have a ‘brain break’ of sorts.  I need to concentrate on what I am doing, set goals for myself, etc. and it keeps me healthy.

Before I let you go here are some thoughts from Charlotte Mason:  Time for Mothers

“If mothers could learn to do for themselves what they do for their children when these are overdone, we should have happier households. Let the mother go out to play! If she would have the courage to let everything go when life becomes too tense, and just take a day, or half a day, out in the fields, or with a favourite book, or in a picture gallery looking long and well at just two or three pictures, or in bed, without the children, life would go on far more happily for both children and parents. The mother would then be able to hold herself in “wise passiveness’ and would not fret her children by continual interference even of hand or eye – she would let them be.”

Who was Charlotte Mason?

Charlotte Maria Shaw Mason (1 January 1842 – 16 January 1923) was a British educator who invested her life in improving the quality of children’s education. Her ideas led to a method used by some  homeschoolers.

I am getting better at finding a balance that is right for me and my family providing myself with time to take part in something which interests me.  I don’t always put myself last, and when survival mode hits I still manage to take care of me too, finding sprinkles of grace throughout my day.

What about you, what interests do you have?  What can you do to help recharge and take care of yourself?